diagnosis

Autism diagnosis – one year on

I set out writing this post with the intention to reflect on the last 14 months or so since my autism diagnosis; however I’ve found a lot more to reflect about than I had expected(!) so this is going to end up as a series of posts, each with a particular theme. (Or more likely, it will be one post and then get forgotten.) This particular post is about how my diagnosis has helped me to manage the social interactions in my life, and reframe some of the negative beliefs I held about myself as a person. Since being diagnosed with autism just over a year ago, I’ve been fairly open about it, both in my online life and my ‘real’ one. I feel the need to talk about it in a way that I never have with sexuality, mental health, or other aspects of my personality. Autism has become part of my identity.

January 21, 2020 No Comments

Taking the mask off

My autism diagnosis is still a really new thing for me, but I’ve been feeling more and more over the last couple of weeks that I wanted to tell people about it. One reason is because there are quite probably tens of thousands of people like me, who have no clue that they’re autistic, and the only way that is going to change is by amplifying autistic voices and providing an alternative to the ‘awkward geeky guy’ stereotype that most people associate with the word ‘autism’. The other reason though, I think, is because I feel this real need to live my new life as authentically as possible. My life since diagnosis has been a series of lightbulb moment – sudden realisations that explain so many different aspects of my past. I do feel like a different person. I feel calmer, lighter, more aware of myself. I’m enjoying getting to know the person under the many layers of masking that have built up over the last 38 years.

January 5, 2019 No Comments

I am taking part in the Instagram Chronic Illness January Photo Challenge, and I thought I’d try and write a few blog posts to go along with the pictures I’m posting. Today’s theme is ‘Diagnosis’. One of my main motivations for writing about my experience with autism – aside from using the process of writing to help me work through my thought process – is to provide another voice for women who have lived a significant portion of their lives without knowing that they’re autistic. I’m certain I will know other people who are on the spectrum, but haven’t realised it, and if writing honestly about my experiences can help someone else make a connection with their own life then I feel I ought to do it.

January 2, 2019 No Comments

Sensory issues?

I thought I couldn’t be autistic because I didn’t have any sensory issues. Then I remembered how much I hate stickers. Thin, shiny bit of paper that stick to your skin. Urgh. And then they peel up at the edges and when you brush up against them they make a flicking noise… it makes me cringe. I hate going on training courses where they make you wear name stickers. I have learned to tolerate it, but I will take them off as soon as I can. The trouble is, taking them off involves touching them, and then when you try to throw them away they get stuck to your fingers…

October 7, 2018 No Comments